Is it really possible to change your world? Read on to learn how kindness matters!
Lao Tse said, “If there is to be peace in the world, there must be peace in the nations. If there is to be peace in the nations, there must be peace in the cities. If there is to be peace in the cities, there must be peace between neighbors. If there is to be peace between neighbors, there must be peace in the home. If there is to be peace in the home, there must be peace in the heart.”
It all begins with us. For me, peace in the heart most equates with love and kindness. I’ve written about love here before, so for now I want to focus on kindness and how it is important, not just for peace in the world as Lao Tse said, but also for your own life and personal spiritual path. It would be enough to stop at the motivation of creating world peace, but that can be difficult for us to grasp on a day to day, individual level. How can peace or kindness or love in my heart impact the world? It’s too big a leap for most of us.
Moving Day
Let’s then begin with a personal story that demonstrates how kindness matters. We recently relocated for my husband’s job and his company required that the movers pack our belongings for us for insurance reasons. This meant they were with us for several days, packing, then loading. We worked alongside them, offered them food and drink, and had some nice conversations. We also offered them the use of our car each night so they could leave their truck in front of our house.
Each man told us how remarkable our behavior was. I was shocked. I said, “We are just being nice. You are guests in our home, even though you are doing a job for us. We are simply treating you like we would anyone else who came here.” Each said that, no, they were not often treated with kindness. I was shocked and saddened. They said, “You’d be surprised how we are typically treated.”
The same thing happened when the painters came to spruce up our new house. Again, I was saddened. I recently went to get my hair cut and the woman who cuts it came to walk me back to her station and smiled a big smile. She said, “I’m glad you’re here. I could use someone positive in my chair today.” I was pleased that I could brighten her day, but again I was saddened because we all have the ability to brighten each other’s day all the time, every day. And it’s easy. All we have to do is be kind.
Developing Kindness
Of course I have had my moments as an adult that I’m not particularly proud of, when I lost my patience or reacted from my own mood which had nothing to do with the other person. But my ability to respond with kindness has grown as my spiritual awakening has progressed. Several things help me to stay kind.
The first is the knowledge that to be kind is to be in alignment with who we really are. Really. We are Source, so we are kind, loving, full of integrity, peaceful, etc., at our core. To be kind is simply to act from that place. Anything less than that creates a dissonance. You might feel justified or prideful because you got what you felt was yours. You might feel justified because you were only reacting with the same way you were being treated. But those responses are in dissonance with your core.
You will actually feel better responding with kindness. Kindness is a high vibration. Seeking to genuinely stay in kindness will keep you in that vibration and make you feel great. This new vibration may also provide healing for you as it changes the energy that is flowing through your body proving that kindness matters.
In Buddhism, loving-kindness is a path to enlightenment. Through the practice of kindness, you will feel the shift along that path. There is a practice that begins with sending out loving-kindness to those that it is easy to, like family and friends, and progresses to sending it out to those people that you don’t particularly like so much and even to people you might call enemies. This is wonderful practice that makes you feel terrific as the loving-kindness flows through your body and out into the world. It also breaks down barriers within you and makes it easier to be kind to those you don’t know and to those who have hurt you.
Many years ago, I started doing my own form of loving-kindness practice without even realizing it. Shortly after my spiritual awakening, when I learned about the vibrations of emotions and how higher vibrations were healing, I would become very aware when I wasn’t happy because it really didn’t feel good. I drove through a depressed part of town to get to work each day and I realized that I reacted with fear when I saw the homeless man or the tough looking teen. I noticed that this fear felt bad, so I began to say, “I love you,” in my head, instead of responding with fear. I quickly noticed a difference in how I felt and I knew that what I was sending out into the world was now a good vibration and that was important to me.
That “I love you” started to become my default response in more and more situations, not just driving down that one street. I didn’t even have to try.
It also helps me to remember that I have no idea what other people are going through. So many people seem to be facing all kinds of challenges these days. My kindness may be the thing that they need that day. I certainly would have compassion and treat them kindly if I knew their difficulties, so if someone is being impatient or angry with me, I just assume they are having troubles that are creating their behavior. That thinking helps me be even more patient and kind in the face of negative behavior.
What is remarkable about kindness is that when you are kind to someone else, they will often be kind to you in return. It’s a win-win. This doesn’t mean that you can’t get your needs met. It is possible to be assertive without being aggressive. I wager that you will find that people actually want to help you when you are relentlessly kind to them. Relentless kindness—there’s a fun concept. Let’s see if we can spread that around! With practice in this concept, you, too, will see how kindness matters.
You may find that you catch people off guard. Sadly, it seems, that we are expecting to be treated badly and we are often finding it. Through kindness, you will be a blessing to others and the law of cause and effect says that blessing will come back to you.
Kindness does matter. It’s a choice and it’s up to you. Peace is in your hands.
Wendy Joy is a healer and the author of Clear Channel: A Guide for the Newly Awakening. Learn more from Wendy at her new Youtube channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC24ci5pBXaWwxi7-nugEq6w or visit her at www.wendyjoy.net.
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