As I was going to work the other day I heard a golden oldie from my high school days. In 1970s, The Five Man Electrical Band put out the song titled: SIGNS, SIGNS, EVERYWHERE SIGNS; written by Les Emmerson.
By Rebecca Nidey
Everything I Need To Know I Learned In A Haunted House
If you do a little math in your head you will figure out that I, too, am a golden oldie. Just like most music, this song got me to thinking about the significance of signs in our lives (and of course, deaths).
The first few lines of the song read like this:
“SIGNS, SIGNS
EVERYWHERE A SIGN
BLOCKIN’ OUT THE SCENERY
BREAKIN’ MY MIND”
Going about our business every day, we deal with signs. ‘STOP’, ‘NO LOITERING’, ‘NO LITTERING’, ‘MUST YIELD TO TRAFFIC.’ The list goes on and on forever. Then there are the audible ‘signs’ we hear every day. The siren emitted by emergency vehicles rushing to do battle against fire, violence, or death tells us to pull over to the side of the road and give way to their traffic. In the town I live in is a huge petroleum refinery and their warning tone always alerts us to the possibility of dangerous weather or problems within the confines of their campus. The odors of smoke or noxious gasses can alert us to other hazards in our environment. There are even some visible signs that may not even have words attached to them… the red, yellow and green of a stoplight.
Many of these signs seem to have negative connotations but actually are protective and positive. If you do not stop at a stop sign or red light it is very possible there will be a crash. Littering can spoil the environment and may cause injury to our health. The scent of smoke or gas tells us to be aware, something is amiss. Heeding the warning of the odors can avert a disaster.
The key to all of the situations I just listed is PAY ATTENTION. How many times do we go through our day with our eyes down looking at our cell phones or with it attached to our ear, watching a television screen, or with our mind on the thousand and one tasks we have to complete by a certain deadline? Besides all of the distractions we manufacture for ourselves, there are the countless others perpetrated by those who inhabit our ‘space,’ as well as Mama Nature.
I live across the street from a grade school and there are so many distractions surrounding it at this time of the year. Parents drop kids off at the school with music blasting. The air brakes of the buses punctuate the sound of laughing children getting on or off. I can set my morning alarm to the sound of the janitor at the school dropping the metal lid of the trash bin. Then there’s the quieter distraction provided by nature. Birds heralding the sunrise, sunset and all the time in between while the breeze gently riffles through the leaves on the playground trees are all pleasant diversions.
However, as the song distracted me from my too short journey to work, it also reminded me of the parallels between life and death. Do we become so caught up in the details of our lives that we don’t catch the signals from those we care about; whether they are alive or have passed into spirit?
People tend to give off signals that indicate something is ‘off.’ With those I work with in my department, it is very easy to read that something is troubling them (or the opposite-elating them) by their stance, tone and facial expression. Sometimes you can even feel the vibes coming off of them. In the rhythm of our friendships and work styles, we become familiar with them and can read the signs. The same goes for my family and friends.
Working in a hospital, we also can see, hear, and feel the joy shining through from a new set of grandparents at the much anticipated birth of the newest branch of their family tree. Slumped shoulders and a tense stance of some people can say as much about the sad news they have just received, as the tears running down their cheeks. I am very proud to say that the staff of this hospital responds to and shares both the joy and sadness.
Just as it can be easy to be distracted by the signs issued by the people living in our ‘space,’ it can be more so when dealing with signs from beyond. No matter the length of time since we lost someone we care about, there is always an empty space in our lives that matches the empty space at the dining room table.
During the first days of mourning we are struggling to reshape our lives to fit around that hole. Our hearts are as heavy as our steps and it is sometimes hard to concentrate on anything but taking in a breath and letting it out because the pain is so great. We wish for a sign from our loved one letting us know they are OK…all the while thinking it is our imagination and wishful thinking that we could receive this assurance.
Gradually, time helps us adapt and we can go on with our everyday tasks and learn to laugh again. By this time, we are once again concentrating on the details of life. Since there is no timetable for grief, it is a different schedule for everyone. However, the distractions of our lives keep us from noticing the possible signs we had once hoped for.
THEN SOMETHING HAPPENS! A song comes out of nowhere that triggers a memory from fifty years ago. Your Mom’s favorite bird, a cardinal, sits on your windowsill and cocks its head at you while looking into your eyes for a length of time not normal for a bird. Perhaps you catch a whiff of your Dad’s favorite cologne in the middle of a deserted field. While sitting in your car at a stop sign, you glance at the license plate on the car in front of you and it contains some message (house number, birthdate, saying, etc.) that is so obscure and specific it could only be significant to you and someone you knew who passed on into spirit
Signs, signs, everywhere signs. I once heard it said that there are no coincidences and I believe that is so for many things paranormal, mystical, or metaphysical. There are really very few things that fit into those categories. If we keep an open mind, we realize that they are just not normal as we know them at this time. Although most encounters with our deceased loved ones do not include actually audibly hearing their voices (which would most likely scare the crap out of us), they still can communicate. How they do so doesn’t really matter, it is just paying attention… being mindful enough to notice.
A friend who passed fairly young was both a firefighter and member of the local rescue squad (whom he was instrumental in starting). The rescue squad number he was assigned was 313 and whenever I see it, I know he isn’t far away, especially when it appears in a random fashion. My parents make themselves known by the smell of cigarette smoke (my Mom) and Old Spice aftershave (my Dad). Others that I have known who are no longer alive have musical messages they use to communicate with me.
Recently I was reading up on one of the most inspirational people I can think of. Helen Keller had been born with normal sight and hearing but lost these senses at a young age to an illness. Despite the fact she was virtually locked into a dark and silent world, she struggled to become ‘normal’ once again. With the help of her innovative teacher, Anne Sullivan, Helen leaned to communicate and receive communication. Using sign language and braille she was able to once again engage in conversation and eventually learned to speak. The sensitive touch she developed allowed her to lay her fingertips on a person’s lips or a resonate board and feel the spoken words or audible notes of music. Helen became the first person who was both blind and deaf to earn a Bachelor’s Degree in Art. During her lifetime she traveled the world as an advocate of human rights and a gifted speaker and writer.
She left many thoughtful and wise sayings when she passed away in 1968 and one of the most telling is this: “The only thing worse than being blind is having sight but no vision.” In our struggle with grief over death and life in general we often seem both blind and deaf to the signs all around us.
Another of her special communications was: “The most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched-they must be felt with the heart.” For a woman who was both blind and deaf, she seemed to have the power to see and hear much more than those of us who should be able to clearly focus on sight and sound. In her words: “The inner or mystic sense gives me vision of the unseen. They skeptically declare that I see light that never was. But I know that their mystic sense is dormant, and that is why there are barren places in their lives. They prefer facts to vision. They want a scientific demonstration and they can have it. It is out of this ape that God creates the seer and science meets spirit as life meets death, and life and death are one.”
Whether you believe in a Higher Being is irrelevant. I believe that what Helen was trying to convey is that we must stretch the boundaries of what is considered to be normal and reasonable or we will not be able to accept signs from those who have passed into spirit. You do not have to have 20-20 vision to see signs, nor do you have to have perfect hearing to listen for them. A special ability like mediumship is not necessary either. What you really need is an open mind and an open heart and the sense of mindfulness that will open communications between those in life and death. If a blind and deaf woman can achieve the ability to see and hear through innovation and sheer tenacity, perhaps we can all do the same. Is it so far fetched to think that it is possible to recognize SIGNS, SIGNS, EVERYWHERE SIGNS? I challenge you to open your senses up to the possibilities!
About the Author:
Through her work on the investigative team for the Crawford County Illinois Ghost Hunters, Rebecca Nidey has an understanding of the paranormal, spiritual, and metaphysical worlds and how they work together.
Rebecca has trained in the Healing Touch technique (a form of energy healing). She is a certified Psychic Medium trained by Belle Salisbury, and she is a certified Paranormal Researcher.
Rebecca is the associate editor for Bellesprit Magazine and also writes a column titled Everything I Need To Know I Learned In A Haunted House. She has been a co-host of several radio programs for the Haunted Voices Radio Network and HeyZ Radio Network highlighting the Paranormal, metaphysical and literary fields.
To learn more about Rebecca or to schedule a reading you can contact her at https://www.facebook.com/rebecca.nidey.