Sharon Pearl exudes a sense of serenity, and in her presence, it is easy to slow the monkey mind to allow Spirit to enter.
By Edie Weinstein
I had the joy of witnessing her in action at a retreat last year, during which she led an experience of diving deep with the Divine. Some of us gathered in her room afterward as she lit the Shabbos candles to honor the Jewish Sabbath, said a blessing over the ‘fruit of the vine,’, called the Kiddush, which in our case, was grape juice in little plastic cups and over the challah- braided bread that is referred to as ‘the bread of the Earth’ in the prayer known as the Motzi.
Sharon K. Pearl provides individual and group spiritual direction. A veteran teacher of adult education at area synagogues, Jewish service organizations, Sharon is a lay leader at P’nai Or Philadelphia. Sharon leads enriching workshops that support participants’ spiritual growth. She is an ordained Mashpiah Ruchanit (Spiritual Director), having studied in a three year mentorship with Sandra B. Cohen, DSW and is a member of Spiritual Directors International. Sharon’s spirituality informs her other important role as a Speech Language Pathologist in private practice for over 30 years, serving a pediatric and adult population with speech, language, learning, and auditory processing disorders.
To assist us in getting to know Sharon a bit more I asked her some questions:
Edie: What does spirituality mean to you?
Sharon: For me, spirituality is about connecting with the Holy. It’s about opening oneself to the oneness of the universe and becoming a vessel to hold that oneness. Unity can be thought of as having a deep and abiding respect for all life – both animate and inanimate. This would involve care of the earth and each other.
It’s about a cycle of receiving Divine abundant flow, grounding it here on earth and sending it back out into the universe through acts of loving kindness.
It would involve raising the everyday ordinary activities of daily life for higher purposes in a never ending cycle of receiving and giving back.
Edie: How do you view the Divine? Entity? Energy? Both? Neither?
Sharon: God is multilayered. In order to explain this, I use the analogy of the body. Your body has many parts and layers to it, such as your eyes, nose, heart, brain; systems, such as circulatory system and digestive system. But your body is also one because we get upset if one of our parts doesn’t work very well. I believe that God is One, but God has parts. ….so to answer your question, God is an entity and God is energy and God is an energetic entity, depending upon what aspect of the Divine you’re focused on. The beauty of it is that who God is for you is the aspect of God that you focus on so that everyone has a different experience of God.
Edie: Is there a difference for you between religion and spirituality?
Sharon: Yes, and I am very fortunate to have found a deep spirituality in my faith tradition, but I didn’t start there. As a young adult, I joined a 12 Step Recovery group for overeating and through my working of the steps to recovery, I developed a personalized Higher Power whom I call “The Big G”. The tying of the two together came many years later when I found a community in my faith tradition that is both spiritually alive and that supports me in being intellectually honest. My faith tradition offers many opportunities to ground my spirituality. The cycle of the Holy days are all opportunities to connect and reconnect with my spiritual center.
Edie: Please explain what it means to be a Spiritual Director.
Sharon: I am gifted with a sacred trust by a seeker who shares their experiences of the Holy with me. Through deep listening, a spiritual director supports a seeker in their journey with the Divine. A spiritual director and seeker typically meet once a month, either individually or in a small group, for the purpose of understanding, exploring, or deepening the seekers’ experience of the Divine. Spiritual Direction is a contemplative practice that supports a seeker’s connection and understanding of the Holy in their everyday activities and in the extraordinary events of their life.
Edie: What is the difference between the role you have taken on and that of a pastoral counselor?
Sharon: While there is certainly overlap in the work of a spiritual director and pastoral counselor, pastoral counseling is typically short term and crisis oriented and geared to problem solving. I explain it like this: If your life is akin to ‘white noise,’ the pastoral counselor is for the “spikes” in the white noise. The pastoral counselor is found in the hospital room and the funeral parlor. Spiritual direction is for the background noise of your life, the everyday stuff and is centered in the grocery store and the gas station. Spiritual direction is not problem focused and a seeker may consult with a spiritual director for lengthy periods of time. With its focus on a seeker’s relationship with God, a seeker gains a different perspective on any given situation and it often becomes clear how to proceed.
It’s also different from psychotherapy or counseling. In spiritual direction, I want you to know, ‘What has God got to do with it?’ A counselor or therapist is interested in other aspects of the client’s situation. I find that when I bring God into it for a seeker, that the seeker has a different perspective on the situation. For my clients who are also in therapy, my work supports their therapy. For a client who is spiritually based, my work often gives them the support they need in order for them to do the hard work of the therapy.
Edie: How did you make the decision to travel that path?
Sharon: When I became a lay leader at P’nai Or of Philadelphia, a Jewish renewal community in Mt. Airy, I found tremendous joy in creating a Sabbath morning service that encouraged community members to do their inner work within the context of the service, but I yearned for something more personal. I wanted to support folks in a more personal way through the lens of the Divine. When I learned about SD, I enrolled in a three year mentorship program to become a SD.
Edie: Are we ‘hardwired for God’?
Sharon: I think so. Even for those whose belief systems preclude the existence of “God”, they often have experiences that they cannot explain rationally. SD is about acknowledging the experience, not necessarily about affixing labels to it.
Edie: What modalities do you incorporate?
Sharon: I incorporate silence, meditation and contemplation, and questions of discernment for the seeker’s discernment of God in the situation they are presenting; I also incorporate chanting and melody; personal or liturgical prayer; drawing. Occasionally I include activities such as walking or dancing.
Edie: What issues do people bring to the table? I imagine some of them have to do with loss and grief, perhaps questioning why God would allow certain things to happen.
Sharon: Certainly seekers come to Spiritual direction in times of crisis, but very often it’s because they’ve had a gnawing need for a very long time. Perhaps they haven’t yet found their life purpose and want a forum for listening more deeply to their innermost self or soul.
Edie: Although your personal practice is Judaism, do you also work with those of other faiths?
Sharon: Yes. I use the symbols and rituals that seekers are comfortable with no matter what faith tradition they arise from. What’s important is that the seeker relates to it. There are times that a seeker will be more comfortable with a spiritual director who is not from their faith tradition.
Edie: Can you share some stories about how Spiritual Direction has made a difference in the lives of those with whom you have worked?
Sharon: One woman who, at 70, loved her work and was still working part time. She realized that while she still loved it, there were negative consequences for her in other aspects of her life. In spiritual direction, she realized that it was time to retire completely when I asked her, “What is your soul’s desire for you at this time of your life?”
Someone who is very grounded in his religion and has been a religious school teacher for many years couldn’t find God for himself, nor could he serve to guide the young people he was teaching. Through our SD meetings he realized that he has had God in his life all along, he had just never recognized it.
Someone who swears that God is angry and vindictive (if God exists at all!) Is beginning to open to the possibility that God can be joy and peace. It creates tremendous gratitude for his gifts and so he’s a happier person.
I would like to share some Feedback I have received from spiritual seekers:
“For the past three years, I’ve had the pleasure of being a member of a small group of people who regularly enter a sacred space created by Sharon Pearl. Here I can think about things I normally do not think about, share things I normally do not share, and listen to the responses of people I’ve come to admire. Strong bonds have been formed because we have become intellectually intimate in a very safe environment, and we have come to trust one another with our personal searches for a relationship with the Infinite.” LB
“Over the past five years, I have been meeting with Sharon either individually or in a small group. In our group, there is a profound sense of safety, intimacy and truthfulness. Sharon has supported us in creating a level of safety and comfort that enables us to explore our souls, take reasonable risks, and compare notes. Our meetings are always disciplined and structured with lots of openings for improvisation. When we meet, the things I share often transform into discussions I would have never dreamed I’d be having.
Sharon can ask thoughtful and challenging questions. She asked one that was a real stunner. After a long rambling story about everyday responsibilities, schedules and finances, she asked, “Who would you be, without the ‘Doing?” It was like having a bucket of cold water thrown in my face. I understood that who or what I thought I was, was buried under so many layers of misdirection that I had lost track of who I was and what my purpose is. It was a question more about my soul than about any corporeal identity. It asked, “Who are you?” Tell me about the “Who” that you are … that will live forever. And what are the expectations and responsibilities of this entity? Is it here that you might glimpse your own soul? This is not the sort of thing that often comes up in casual conversation.
Like a good bandleader, Sharon waves her baton and keeps everyone on track and mysteriously we seem to return to the same theme. “What’s God Got to do with it?
…And, you can wrestle with that question for quite a while.” NB
“Spiritual direction has provided me with a safe place to share concerns about myself, my family, my work, and I know I will be respectfully heard. For several years, I have been in a group with three amazing individuals who are doing the same. I never know exactly how a particular session will develop, what I’ll bring up, or how others will respond. I’ve learned so much about the others and myself in a deep, spiritual manner. I’ve learned that my concerns are not unique in the universe. Sharon never fails to bring us back to the question, “How does this relate to your relationship with G-d?” Discussions are lively, spirited, and most thoughtful. I am fortunate to have received positive feedback and helpful direction from group members who ‘get’ what I’m talking about. I am very grateful.” MI
Sharon is such an amazing spiritual guide for anyone who is seeking to identify their true spiritual self. For this reason, I am honored to place her among the Bellesprit Beautiful Spirits.
If you would like to learn more about Sharon, visit her web site at www.sharonpearlma.com.
About the Author:
Edie Weinstein is a career journalist with 23 years experience interviewing some of the most amazing movers and shakers on the planet, including Ben & Jerry,Shirley MacLaine, Ram Dass, Michael Beckwith, Jack Canfield, Alan Cohen, Karen Drucker, Judith Orloff, Louise Hay, Marianne Williamson, Dan Millman, Wayne Dyer, Elizabeth Lesser, Arielle Ford, Debbie Ford, SARK, Bernie Siegel and His Holiness the Dalai Lama. In addition, she is an interfaith minister, dynamic motivational speaker, opti-mystic, (seeing the world through the eyes of possibility), transformational coach, social worker and PR Goddess. From 1988-1998, she was co-publisher of Visions Magazine. Find out more at www.opti-mystical.com/.
