A traumatic amputation is a separation of a body part from the body which leaves behind a jagged wound while causing great damage to the surrounding area.
By Rebecca Nidey
Everything I Need To Know I Learned In A Haunted House
I know you are wondering after that first sentence if you stumbled into the correct column or if the author had gone a little too far around the bend. Just to let you know, you are reading the correct column and the author went fairly far around the bend a long time ago. However, the first line can explain so many things if you look at it from several angles and viewpoints.
Knowing many first responders, I have heard the term “traumatic amputation” several times over the years. Of course, they spoke of it in a purely physical and medical context. Have you ever thought that the death of a loved one is, in essence, a form of traumatic amputation? No matter if the death was expected or totally sudden and out of the blue, it causes trauma to those left behind and possibly to those who have passed. It leaves a painful wound and jagged scar.
When death takes hold of someone we have known and cared for we suffer trauma of the heart and spirit. How often have you heard someone say “when he (she) died they took a piece of my heart with them”? I know this to be true from personal experience and sharing a loss with others I care about. When a person passes it often feels as if a large hole as opened up inside you. The jagged area can encompass a whole family, workplace, community or even a country.
Eventually the wound heals somewhat but there is still a scar. The trouble with the scars that are left in this manner is that they are often not visible on the surface. The blemish is instead deep in your heart and spirit. You go on with your day to day living, learning to smile again and get back to a routine, but the scar is always there.
Not wanting to make others sad, we internalize our grief and sorrow and carry on without vocalizing it. Or we give in to the emotions and never allow the wounds to gradually heal. That jagged area where our loved one once dwelled continues to be a cause of pain. It is hard to find the balance of sorrow and healing but there are ways to gain a bit of harmony between the two.
Learn to share… memories, stories, pictures, events, places. Although tinged with sorrow, they provide a portrait of happy times we shared with the one who passed. When I was a young girl, I had a good friend who lived around the corner from me. On some occasion which has slipped my mind, my friend gave me a bracelet that had been in her family. I protested that it should stay in the family but she insisted. Although it was beautiful, I never felt comfortable wearing it but kept it for many years. My dear friend developed an aggressive form of leukemia and had a bone marrow transplant. After developing some complications she passed at a fairly young age leaving several children. As her youngest daughter started to reach adolescence I met her and was able to give the bracelet to her as well as some wonderful memories of the mother she barely remembered. The bracelet was beautiful but not as precious as the stories I was able to share with my friend’s daughter. Both were gifts that provided some healing for both of us. We should not be afraid to share our sorrow as long as we temper it with loving recollections.
This past weekend, a short way from where I live, a young woman lost her life in a vehicle accident. She was a daughter, a granddaughter, a mother, a wife, a co-worker and a friend to many. To compound the tragedy, she was pregnant with her second child so it was a double loss. This kind of shocking misfortune is very much an example of a traumatic amputation of the hearts and spirits of all those she had touched in her young life. As a nurse, she had seen tragedy from the other side of the coin and used her healing abilities to help those who had suffered the loss. Now her loved ones are dealing with the same situation. Remembering the joy and love she dispensed in her work, she will, in a way, be healing from spirit instead of the physical world. Although I will not mention her name or any other details, I ask that you all send love and healing to her family and to the young driver of the other vehicle involved. This young one will have to bear the pain of having been involved in a tragedy that was not of their making. As I said, a traumatic amputation causes great damage to the surrounding area.
When I was very young I had a great uncle, long since gone, who was an amputee. One of his legs had been lost in some sort of accident and he wore a prosthetic. As a child it was both fascinating and scary to see his artificial leg. He would cringe in pain sometimes and talk of phantom pains in his missing leg. I never completely understood that term “phantom pain” till I was older and could look it up (and that was well before google). For those not familiar with that term, it refers to the sensation that an amputated body part is still there and in use, often feeling the pain of muscle cramps and raw nerves.
As someone who has had loved ones pass into spirit, I can attest that sometimes I do have the sensation they are still there. Speaking with others in the same situation, they also have felt the same way. I have often heard “it’s as if they just stepped into the next room” or “I feel like they just left on a trip and sometime soon they will return.” The phantom pain comes when we realize that physically they will not be coming back. However, I have also had the feeling of a fleeting hug or someone sitting beside me when I am thinking of one who is gone into spirit. Although the body is not there, the spirit still remains. It is comforting to me to know that the essence of someone, that which makes them who they are, can still keep in contact with us.
As a paranormal investigator, I have also seen this theory in action. We have often gotten calls from clients complaining of some angry spirit or even demon who has invaded their space. These ghosts open cabinets and slam doors. They move things and sometimes even push or throw objects. The clients are afraid and it is up to us to explain the situation and try to allay those fears.
I am going to put forth a very odd theory and ask that you consider it with an open mind. There are some truly angry ghosts and poltergeists (a noisy ghost in German) but I feel the majority of these incidents are merely spirits trying to get your attention. The saying goes that “as they were in life, they are in death” and we have all known some down-right unpleasant and mean people. Think of death as a full body amputation and all that is left is the energy of their spirits. The light bulb of their bodies burned out but the power is still there that lit up their being. That energy can be used to perform these actions but it is not necessarily out of anger.
We living are sometimes so absorbed in….well….living that we don’t notice the spirits around us. Sometimes the actions have to be a little noisy to get our attention. There is nothing to fear, only to comprehend and acknowledge. Most people only want to be acknowledged and appreciated while alive and it doesn’t necessarily stop when we pass into spirit. That brings up my challenge for this month (didn’t know you’d have homework, did you?). Acknowledge, appreciate, and love those around you while they can enjoy it. Touch the lives of others and make a difference that will continue to be felt long after you are gone. We never know when we will suffer a traumatic amputation in our lives (or deaths). If we are going to make a ripple in this pond we call life, let’s make sure it is a ripple of love instead of a ragged wound.
About the Author:
Through her work on the investigative team for the Crawford County Illinois Ghost Hunters, Rebecca Nidey has an understanding of the paranormal, spiritual, and metaphysical worlds and how they work together.
Rebecca has trained in the Healing Touch technique (a form of energy healing). She is a certified Psychic Medium trained by Belle Salisbury, and she is a certified Paranormal Researcher.
Rebecca is the associate editor for Bellesprit Magazine and also writes a column titled Everything I Need To Know I Learned In A Haunted House. She has been a co-host of several radio programs for the Haunted Voices Radio Network and HeyZ Radio Network highlighting the Paranormal, metaphysical and literary fields.
To learn more about Rebecca or to schedule a reading you can contact her at https://www.facebook.com/rebecca.nidey.
